I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
