pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
