im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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