1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
