Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
