Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I deserve this hangover.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
