ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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