soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
