I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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