I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
