I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
