You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
