I can tuck mytits in my pants
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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