Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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