How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize