help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
