My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
