She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
