Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
