OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
