How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
