Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
