Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
