I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
