so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize