I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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