Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.