i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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