singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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