I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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