Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
