Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
