I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
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I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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