no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
