i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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