Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
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