I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
