you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
