You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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