Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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