Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
