I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
