I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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