we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize