she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
