This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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