brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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