Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
