my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize