Kiss
Puke
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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