Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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